- Aerosmith’s music sales have skyrocketed ever since Steven Tyler started as a judge on American Idol. The songs that are getting purchased the most are the ones that seem to most accurately echo Tyler’s real life – “Shut Up and Dance (and Then We’ll Go Buy Some More Scarves)”, “(My Mouth’s so Large that I Could Unhinge it and) Eat the Rich”, and “Dude (Looks Like a Lady).”
- Carmelo Anthony, the subject of many trade rumors, is possibly being traded to the Lakers for a package including Lamar Odom. If Lamar Odom gets traded to the Nuggets, do you have any clue how much harder it will be to keep up with those Kardashians?
- NYC Public Schools have already reported 1,700 cases of bedbugs this year, on pace to triple last year’s total.
It looks like the bedbugs, much like NYC Public School students, just can’t seem to move on to college.
About Me
I'm a comedy writer and performer and a web designer/developer.
I've studied comedy in NYC with UCB, the PIT and Mediabistro.
“Give us this day our ‘Atkins-friendly low-carb flax bread’.” #PrayersFrom2004
... and the rest of the tweets
- A Denver family is stuck in Dallas due to bent passports. They must have been in the father's back pockets when TSA went to town on him.
- Mr. Kruger from Sienfeld attempted suicide. We're all dealing with Jerry's Acura commercials in our own ways - http://t.co/ls6Qn1iK
- Fun fact - I'm 28 and still have a 90% chance of spelling the word "calendar" wrong on the first try.