Mike Finazzo

SNL – Weekend Update – Emily Blunt

Posted in weekend update
  • A woman in Utah gave birth to her baby while in a Walmart check-out line. Oddly, this occurred in Utah, because it’s literally the logo on the Florida state flag.
  • Lawmakers in New York City have proposed new legislation that would effectively bar the circus from coming to town by banning the use of wild or exotic animals for entertainment. It also spells the end for the City’s all-rat breakdance crews.
  • A growing number of cities around the country are changing the focus of Columbus Day to Indigenous Peoples Day. While many are also now referring to Election Day as Doomsday.
  • A man in Florida protected his prized BMW during Hurricane Matthew by parking it in his living room. And if he didn’t put the car in his living room, there was still a 50-50 chance the storm would have put it there for him.
  • A man on an Alaska Airlines flight was kicked off after he interrupted the flight attendant’s safety talk by yelling “Ooh sexy.” I guess some people just find preparedness VERY arousing.
  • A company in Japan has been reworking rest stop bathroom technology to guarantee that travelers will never have to wait more than 2 minutes for an empty stall. It’s apparently the latest in “if it’s yellow let it mellow” technology.
  • A new study finds that Pokémon Go users took 26 percent more steps than before they started playing the game. Apparently there’s a lot more space to walk around when you finally leave your parent’s basement.